Today was tantrum day. I think it is a full moon or close to it.
Coco 2 1/2 was the first one. We had to go pick up Vivienne from school & she didn't want to. So, what did she do? Throw a tantrum. This was a good one too, lasting about 40 minutes. It started with her flailing on the floor in the living room. I got Audrey into the car, and came back for Coco. (Strategy: get the "easy" ones secured in the car first.) Had to carry her shoes, no putting those on ... one more battle I didn't want to add.
I got her in the car (we are now running about 5 minutes late.). She wants to buckle herself in her car seat now and I usually let her. It takes a little while, but it takes me time to get the other two buckled in, driveway gate open etc. This time though, she was still "upset" and taking too long. So, I tell her I will count to three and if she hasn't done the buckle, I'll buckle it. Well, there are three buckles & I had to do each one. Can you say FURIOUS!?! She went hysterical! Thrashing, screaming and crying. What is she screaming you ask? "I WANT UP!!!" Now, remember, I am already late for my pick up of Vivienne at school. There is no pulling over to hold her and besides, I am not going to reward this behavior. SO, I tell her I can hold her when we get to the school, but now we have to get Vivienne. Turned on some classical music and drive.
I learned early on to be at peace during these tantrums. I can only control myself, and my behavior. If I have a "tantrum" too ... I solve nothing.
We got to Vivienne's school 15 minutes later & Coco was still screaming! I got Vivienne & then came around and took Coco out to hold her for a minute ... hopefully calm her down a bit. Worked for a minute, then I had to put her back in the car. She throws a "minor" tantrum about having to get back in her seat. She buckled herself in though (I did have to count again) and we were on our way. She was asleep 5 minutes late & peace was restored.
What do you find works when your kids act like this (or do they?) Do you have strategies for stopping this type of behavior? I'd love to hear it!
Kingsley had a very long tantrum today. I just let it run it's course, because he doesn't hear what I say, I might as well be the Charlie Brown teacher. He has to snap out if it himself. I do like your advice about not having a tantrum yourself, which I often do. His tantrums last hours, not minutes. This too shall pass, right?
ReplyDelete-Michele
My son has tantrums on almost a daily basis. He is sent to his room so he can carry on and I don't have to hear it. When he finds it difficult to get in his room (which is rare because I am pretty clear about that rule), I walk away from him. WIthout an audience, he stops almost immediately and then comes looking for attention in a more positive way. We always end up talking about it and he can then use his words and know that I am listening to him- as long as he's not screaming at me. We have those Calgon moments OFTEN! and they are LOUD!
ReplyDeleteMichelle Dibb